Total Medals Earned: 417 (From 104 different games.) Total Medal Score: 5,600 Points
Medals Earned: 4/8 (70/205 points)
Destroy 10 enemies without dying
Complete first level
Destroy 50 enemies without dying
Destroy 150 enemies without dying
Score a x1 at the punch machine
Complete the game
Destroy last boss without getting hit
Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!
Medals Earned: 2/5 (30/230 points)
Die
Kill the bagel king on normal mode.
Kill the bagel king on insane mode.
Killed the bagel king without losing any health on normal mode.
Killed the bagel king without losing any health on insane mode.
Medals Earned: 1/11 (10/495 points)
Listen to all songs
Beat Level 1
Kill 10 of each elf type
Beat Level 2
Beat Level 3
Kill 100 enemies with punches to the nuts
Beat Level 4
Beat any of the first four levels without losing any energy
Beat the final level without losing any energy
Beat the game once with each of the 3 playable characters
Beat Level 5
Medals Earned: 4/21 (25/380 points)
Let's take this outside!
Nothing like that first taste of cold beer!
Put em up.
Sometimes you just have to establish dominance.
The sound of silence...
It's just too hard to resist...
Only losers give up and go home alone.
Love hurts.
Fun to ride, but don't let anyone catch you on one.
Sometimes things are best kept to yourself!
Ohh noo! She's beached as bru!
Drink til you drop.
Chicks before dicks.
They looked like mints, but they weren't at all!
Can anyone say... Date rape?
Proven to double your chances!
Ahh... There's nothing like a little Asian takeaway!
Treat her like a lady.
...a hell of a good time!
There's clearly no one that you can't please!
You are officially the master of scoring!
Medals Earned: 1/16 (5/280 points)
Finish the first area
Obliterate the first boss with all weapon slots equipped
Defeat the second boss
Defeat the first boss
Fly 3,000 miles
Kill 4,000 enemies
Collect 2,000 gems (spending them is allowed)
Use each weapon in the game at least once
Defeat the fourth boss
Reach level 20
Defeat the third boss
Finish area 4 of AHK-372 with only a bullet rifle
Finish area 3 of Coeus without triggering any sentry lights
Finish area 4 of Erebos without taking any damage
Medals Earned: 3/7 (15/105 points)
First page found
He See You
Third page
Sixth page
8 pages collected
Medals Earned: 3/10 (20/330 points)
Find your first note.
He saw you, run away!
Find five notes!
Find 10 notes before slenderman gets you
Find 15 notes notes before you go insane!
You have a lot of reading to do.
This is more than I read a year.
I can't believe you're still doing this!
Oops you dropped a book...
Medals Earned: 8/14 (55/290 points)
Cut Off a Conversation
A Nice Center Smash
Ten Crush-Hugs
Five Love Taps
Far Right Smoosh
You Obey the Rule of Three for Big Yucks!
Far Left Hit
Fifteen Gory Love Lunges
20 Hits in Survival
Perfect Score in Story Mode
21 Spikey Embraces
30 Hits in Survival
40 Hits in Survival
50 Hits in Survival
Medals Earned: 4/12 (25/250 points)
You made it through the morning shift!
You're over the hump!
You've learned the fine art of the rebound. Or just got lucky.
You got your first 6 point hit! We're so proud!
You made it! Now time for be-ew-ti-ful dreams.
You've survived through 5 mascots. OK.
You're getting up there!
You survived 20 psychotic mascots! You're a spiking GOD.
You got mad points with little to work with!
You completed employment mode with 100% security!
You smashed 50 guys in one game sitting! That's a lot!
Perfect in the monster challenge
Medals Earned: 1/10 (5/495 points)
Win the race on Cherry Mountain!
Complete Cherry Mountain in under 1 minute 20 seconds!
Win the race on Coastal City!
Race through Coastal City in under 2 minutes 20 seconds!
Beat the race on Neon Good Times!
Blaze through Neon Good Times in under 1:55!
Beat the insane time of 1:12 on Cherry Mountain!
Beat the ridiculous time of 2:10 on Coastal City!
Beat the extreme time of 1:50 on Neon Good Times!